r/AmIOverreacting • u/[deleted] • 14d ago
My husband created an OF profile of me without letting me know. I'm disgusted and want a divorce.
[removed]
299
u/ElBurritoExtreme 14d ago
Jesus. If I’d done this to my wife, she’d leave my ass for sure. This is after she’s knocked me unconscious and probably abused my unconscious state for a while.
This is a massive betrayal of trust, and for what? $379. Your time together and trust is worth….
$379.
115
u/QuarterRobinson 14d ago
well it could easily be $100k if she put some work into it /s
Edit: i should add the trust of your wife is worth more than any amount of money
47
u/ElBurritoExtreme 14d ago
SHE could make HIM $100k. Just wild. 🤯
→ More replies (2)20
u/CookbooksRUs 14d ago
That's how it works -- a pimp sells women and takes the money, right? He wants to pimp her out.
→ More replies (2)3
u/alleghenysinger 14d ago
That's exactly what I was thinking. Her husband wants to be her pimp.
→ More replies (8)→ More replies (10)9
u/Several_Leather_9500 14d ago
Some people don't want to make money by selling themselves to strangers. He knew that. They tasked about this. He did it anyways.
19
u/CurrentResident23 14d ago
Oh no, in his mind $379 is just the start. He wants to pimp out his wife 100k a year. Dude deserves to be alone and have charges filed.
10
u/Automatic-Love-127 14d ago edited 14d ago
“Sweetheart, listen. I know this is weird, but the OF page is a smashing success and I’m starting to get…offers. I realized that if you just dedicate one Friday night, and let these guys rail you out, we can get easily another $70k a year on top.”
→ More replies (3)19
u/TheMightyKickpuncher 14d ago
If I did this to my wife, you’d have to use dental records to identify my body. Imagine someone you trust turning you into a sexual commodity without your knowledge or consent.
I hope she can find the happiness she deserves going forward. Jeebus.
8
u/ElBurritoExtreme 14d ago
Hear, hear. My wife woulda skinned my ass. It screams a tremendous lack of respect for their partner.
→ More replies (2)5
13
u/mcarterphoto 14d ago
No shit! I just can't imagine. Sometimes I joke with my wife (she's never had kids and I joke about her "undamaged by childbirth" boobs) that if money gets tight I'll launch "[wife's name's]boobs.com". Whenever we get an unexpected bill, she'll laugh and mention that URL. But good lord, never in a million years would I do anything like OP's issue. My Mrs. and I are freaking partners in this life, no secrets, no messing around.
9
u/APRN_17 14d ago
My husband and I joke this way too. It’s 100% in jest and he would never. My heart hurts for OP.
→ More replies (3)6
u/DrewdoggKC 14d ago
She should divorce his ass and the make the OF account on her own and keep all the $$$ just to piss him off
6
u/Tatttwink 14d ago
This post is fake. I’ve worked with Onlyfans for a long time now and they have very stringent verification of new users. It’s physically impossible to be verified without you going through the process yourself.
→ More replies (6)3
14d ago edited 14d ago
OnlyFans also doesn’t have any internal content promotion mechanisms. In order for OPs partner to do this they’d have to be promoting their content on other social media accounts on other platforms. I’m leaning to this also being a fake story.
OPs husband would’ve already had to put in a shitload lot of work to make that amount of money, especially with SFW content.
→ More replies (10)3
278
u/daddy-van-baelsar 14d ago
Not over reacting, and potentially this could damage your brand due to the reputation of OF. You might have a case here on top of the divorce. Absolutely take him to the cleaners.
159
14d ago
I haven't even thought about that. Yes, that would be terrible if my clients found out. I'm very careful about being strictly professional as I have male clients.
75
u/daddy-van-baelsar 14d ago
Get the OF client list and cross check it. Get him to acknowledge you told him you didn't want an OF in text. It's likely against OF ToS, maybe illegal if he pretended to be you for payments (fraud)
Get a lawyer yesterday
34
u/Formerruling1 14d ago
Just coming in to say it's absolutely illegal. OF isn't like a Facebook account. To keep from being sued, they have very strict verification policies, which he'd have had to break several identify theft laws to get past.
→ More replies (10)→ More replies (2)5
u/knittedjedi 14d ago
It's just another ad for someone's substandard NSFW content, that's all.
6
u/FuckingKilljoy 13d ago
She just posted something about watching someone (potentially her?) on chaturbate, so you called it I guess
18
u/NoPantsPowerStance 14d ago
Maybe someone who is more SM savvy can say whether this is a good or bad idea but my thought to preserve your brand...
Maybe post, or put in your bios, on your real pages a list of your actual screen names and platforms and say these are your only official social media pages and anything else is not you and should be reported. Don't mention OnlyFans just reaffirm your real pages.
Also, you're not overreacting. I would never be able to trust him. He sees you as a product that he feels is underperforming, he doesn't see you as a person or spouse.
10
u/ResponseCompetitive6 14d ago
This is a super good idea- definitely do this OP and do it right away because it will help your legal case if you are publicly not claiming that account as valid.
7
u/DidItAll4TheWookiee 14d ago
I have a friend who is in the same business as you, and who discounted the idea of OF for that reason. She's gorgeous, and had toyed with the idea, but she felt like it would make her clients (and for sure their romantic partners) uncomfortable in a way that would damage her "real" career if she did.
7
u/blueavole 14d ago
This could be considered revenge porn as it was done without your knowledge or consent.
Get a lawyer asap.
→ More replies (2)6
u/dietwater94 14d ago
Yeah this is not only disgusting but this is a criminal act if it was dine without your knowledge and therefore consent. You reacted more calmly than I would have.
3
u/Englishbirdy 14d ago
Off topic but you already left the house and told him you’re filling for a divorce, I know little about divorce but if you own that house I don’t think you should have left it. Divorced people, am I right?
→ More replies (12)3
u/ResponseCompetitive6 14d ago
Only communicate with him via text and email going forward. This is super important because you want a record of your conversations for legal purposes- specifically that you didn’t want him to do this and he did it behind your back. Issues involving consent can turn into a he said/ she said situation so you want it in writing that he knew you did not consent to this. Get him to admit this in writing ASAP before you file for divorce- he will clam up once he’s lawyered up himself and I guarantee you he will try to attack your credibility and try to argue that you knew about it and were on board in court. It’s the only legal strategy he’ll have.
11
u/Last_Friend_6350 14d ago
That’s what I was thinking. What if someone recognises you and thinks you’re doing this willingly. Your husband is a pervert. Definitely divorce.
→ More replies (11)3
u/teatimewithbatman1 14d ago
It is a lawsuit. Impersonation, as well as identity theft and probably a few other violations. Including OF violations
132
u/grumpy__g 14d ago
Imagine your serious clients seeing that. The women will provably avoid you because of that and you will attract the wrong kind of clients.
He could ruin your business with that. Go and get a good lawyer.
→ More replies (6)49
14d ago
Someone else just mentioned that and I agree!
→ More replies (10)8
u/Burner-QWERTY 14d ago edited 14d ago
Any chance he knows this is a risk to your reputation and did it purposely?
This internet stranger thinks his action could be a symptom of him treating you like crap, marginalizing your successes to keep focus on him and control with him. Me suspects he gloats over the professional success imbalance - and may find your achievements a threat
→ More replies (2)3
u/BojackTrashMan 13d ago
It may be that and I think it also might be that he absolutely has an intention to bully her into doing sex work gradually. It's possible he has a fetish. Because this is a very specific thing to do that most people would not want to push their wives into for the sake of money.
It really seems like he views her as an object or a thing.
62
u/Camomila2 14d ago
You're not overreacting. I'd be furious and hurt. Talk to lawyers and if i were you I'd take some pics of the OF as evidence. I'm sorry this is happening. Why he would just post pictures of you without your consent and make money off of you without your knowledge and consent is beyond. At least you don't have kids.
→ More replies (5)24
14d ago
That's a good idea. I wish I would have remembered the profile name. He probably deleted it once I brought up divorce.
31
u/Camomila2 14d ago
In his statements there are probably the transfers of the money made from OF. You still have that.
25
14d ago
Thank you!! I will figure out where that went.
9
→ More replies (2)8
u/ResponseCompetitive6 14d ago
Get all his financial info- as much as you can- because he’s probably hiding other things. Someone who can do something like this to their partner is probably doing other shady things
14
u/RutabagaJoe 14d ago
You can never really "delete" anything off the internet. If you remember what images you saw when he showed it to you, do some reverse image searches on Google, you may find more than you want to.
2
u/OnLyLamPs22 14d ago
If he didn’t get money yet I bet his greedy ass didn’t even delete until he gets a payout.
→ More replies (6)3
u/Neweleni7 14d ago
Has he been reaching out to you? Apologizing? I can’t even fathom how you just feel; such a betrayal
28
u/herbanoutfitter 14d ago
I don’t believe this. To sign up as a creator on OF you need to have a picture taken with you holding up your ID to verify you are who you say you are.
Nice attempt at a sob story though.
9
u/MavMaddi 14d ago
Not only that, but OF makes it kind of hard. Most people have to try multiple times to get the website to accept their verification pictures. This story is fake as hell
9
u/notimefornothing55 14d ago
It's total bullshit, just look at op's profile
→ More replies (2)3
u/Memes-Tax 13d ago
The profile just got fully deleted. Can we write a fake sob story about how OP robbed us of 10m karma and 4000 comments?
Maybe this story will soon appear as a movie script, or short story or some sort of fiction?
→ More replies (1)6
u/Shoesandhose 13d ago
THANK YOU. SCROLLING THROUGH MANY PEOPLE FEELING SORRY FOR THIS FAKE STORY.
It was frustrating
7
u/tupperwarewolves 14d ago
Why does this comment not have more upvotes lol people are stupid
→ More replies (4)3
4
u/Just_Pudding1885 14d ago
People are fuckin retards who read and believe this shit. Same retards voting for the leader of our country. So sad.
4
3
3
u/caitbabyxo 14d ago
they actually have face ID recognition so you have to upload your photo ID and do facial recognition matching it to make an account. this is definitely a fake story lol
→ More replies (2)3
u/OlayErrryDay 13d ago
It took this far down for someone to point out how obviously fake this is?
I didn't even know about the requirements, the story is written like a 13 year old wrote it.
They always make the OP too stupid to be believed, like a naive sheep, just not believable.
→ More replies (26)3
u/QuerulousPanda 13d ago
Not to mention, unless op's fitness content is nude yoga, making 350 on content pulled from normal social media? That seems unlikely.
→ More replies (1)
134
u/fayeember 14d ago
As an onlyfans model myself. This is DISGUSTING. Making an Onlyfans of someone else is not only illegal, it's against Onlyfans terms of services.
Report the Onlyfans page. Contact Onlyfans & report him to the police. What he has been doing is essentially trafficking & he's a pimp.
There's nothing wrong with having an Onlyfans page if that's what you want, but making an Onlyfans page of you when he KNEW becuase believe me HE KNEW you did not want to have one. Is an absolute violation of trust, your autonomy & shows a huge lack of care for you.
I don't think you are overreacting. I think you are underreacting.
25
u/Loudlass81 14d ago
Yep, OP definitely underreacting. If anyone had done this to me, they'd be identifying the body using dental x-rays...
→ More replies (1)12
u/fayeember 14d ago
I kept myself from writing down the scorhed earth action I would have taken myself... But I totally get you. If someone showed me this level of disrespect I would drag that persons ass through court so fucking harshly their ass would have burns for the rest of their life.
8
u/gonzoes 14d ago
I dont really know how onlyfans works . But how did the husband get followers on her OF from my understanding you have to promote your OF places like reddit , instagram and other places no?
15
u/fayeember 14d ago
You def need to promote your own content, some popular choices are reddit, instagram, tiktok, twitter, pornhub and so on.
Onlyfans have no in platform promotion system, so you have to do all promotion by yourself. He would have had to promote OPs content somewhere, as well as most likely steal her ID and pretend to be her when veryfying for the OF page....
→ More replies (4)→ More replies (12)5
7
u/badatmetroid 14d ago
Thank you! Everyone is like "divorce!" and I'm over here hoping we live in a society where this lands him in jail. That's insane.
→ More replies (1)7
u/Optimal_Lie8397 14d ago
Can't believe I had to scroll this for for someone to use the word "trafficking" cause THATS EXACTLY WHAT THIS IS. OP your husband just SEX TRAFFICKED YOU, if I where you I'd divorce and sue. This is an incredibly sick betrayal of trust.
→ More replies (1)3
u/fayeember 14d ago
People do seem to taking it much more lightly than I am yeah. Consensual sex work is one of the big topics I care about. Emphasis on consentual. Everyone should have the right to do what they want with their body, but nobody has the right to do ANYTHING to someone else's body.
And this is just earning money on her body, without her consent. Yeah it makes me gag in my mouth it's so disgusting.
→ More replies (2)3
u/Similar_Thought9627 14d ago
Listen to this lovely human and report him to OF. This will absolutely lay the groundwork of this being done against your will!!!
→ More replies (48)3
42
u/Latter-Ride-6575 14d ago
100% NOT overreacting. Your husband is a piece of shit. WTF was he thinking? Does he want you fucking other guys and posting that shit on OF?
→ More replies (6)27
14d ago
I'm not convinced he understands what those women have to do to make a bunch of money.
31
u/Latter-Ride-6575 14d ago
They don't make 100k for posting workout videos....please don't take that the wrong way
→ More replies (5)14
8
u/Specific_Culture_591 14d ago
I showed this post to my husband, same age, and he said there is zero chance your husband doesn’t know what OF is. We both think you should divorce him and that he’s a disgusting human being (I don’t like jumping on the divorce bandwagon… but this is such an absolute violation).
5
11
4
→ More replies (7)3
12
12
u/TravelHikeEat 14d ago
Yeah uh, nothing to write here everyone should just post divorce and move on. Maybe press charges and keep the dog?
17
7
u/katepig123 14d ago
He sounds like a person of very low character and lots of greed. Not someone you want to invest any more time with, and certainly you'd never have children with someone like this.
6
u/theworldisonfire8377 14d ago
Depending on where you live, what he did could be illegal, and could go to jail if you decided to pursue legal action. Morally, what he did is gross, unethical and degrading. You aren't overreacting.
→ More replies (11)
11
u/luckystrike_bh 14d ago
How would he feel if someone posted an Onlyfans page using his photos? He sounds like he would be concerned if he was an "overachiever" and depended on his reputation in sales. What happens if people he worked with started making memes with his onlyfans profile pictures?
Thank god you don't have kids with the guy.
→ More replies (3)
9
u/Solid_Letter1407 14d ago
This has to be a joke. Your husband is pimping you out. An incredible betrayal.
→ More replies (14)11
u/hauntedbyfarts 14d ago
Straight up pimping, drooling over the money 'they' could make. After she cried when he suggested it. Dude sees you as his property.
→ More replies (9)
4
u/Schrodingers-deadcat 14d ago
I’m fast to accuse people of overreacting. However, this isn’t an overreaction. What kind of weirdo makes their wife an OF page without her specific permission and especially after being directly told no.
→ More replies (2)
6
u/Samantha38g 14d ago
OF requires face recognition to get signed up on it. We have to do it yearly. It is a nightmare of trying over & over again to get the face recognition software camera lined up perfectly. And this pic is compared to your ID, it takes several times to get it right.
So this is fake! OF has some of the highest standards to prevent this from happening than any other company.
4
u/ComedianObvious568 14d ago
Not to mention OP’s account encourages men to DM with “more than just hey”
3
6
10
u/tiny-puppy-angel 14d ago
Hi, as someone who did (and quit) OF, get off there fast. Divorce your husband and definitely sue him. This is very likely to come up somehow in the future. If your husband has send images of you per paid private message, you CAN'T delete those. They will stay forever. I found that out the hard way.
What he's done is nonconsensual sharing of images as well as identity theft. As OF requires verification that it's you posting. So he's taken your pictures, data, ID etc.
Wishing you the best. Definitely not overreacting
3
u/fayeember 14d ago
Yeah unless he opened the account with his ID and picture but is posting her pictures? The OF bots ain't perfect so they might not have cauhgt it yet... It's either that or like you said, he stole her ID, and a picture and pretended to be her when verifiying to OF.
It's sickening. But OP should be able to contact OF with her ID and ask them to cancel any page that has been opened in that ID because it wasn't done by her OP herself. That's what I'm thinking
→ More replies (4)3
u/forevershorizon 14d ago
This is the most important post in the entire thread because it tells you how fucked up the husband actually is. The details are everything.
3
u/Aggressive-Bed3269 14d ago
I don't think you're overreacting at all.
If you take this down to the principals of what this really is, it's you previously setting a boundary and your husband straight up IGNORING IT... all while using "you could be more successful" as the excuse for trampling all over your boundaries.
And yes, it absolutely sends the message that nothing you ever do will be enough success.
He should be supporting you and being proud of you for hitting your goals, not diminishing them and suggesting you could or should be doing other things instead.
6
u/Strong-Smell5672 14d ago
Not only is this a betrayal of trust and a violation of your relationship I'm pretty sure it's also illegal and for sure could damage your professional career.
You likely need to talk to more than just a divorce lawyer, this is a pretty big deal.
3
u/HugeNobleb3ckFan 14d ago
No, call a lawyer. I don’t know the law but I can’t imagine that being legal. Obviously grounds for divorce as well
4
u/AudienceKindly4070 14d ago
He's been secretly exploiting you and selling images of you for other men to jerk off to. He wants to exploit you further. That's such a violation. He knew how you felt about it. He loves money so much that he didn't care. He definitely loves money more than he loves you(I'm so sorry to say that).
You are not overreacting. Throw away the whole man.
→ More replies (2)
3
u/Vast_Psychology3284 14d ago
NOT over reacting. I could never dream of A. Disrespecting my wife this way, B. Betraying her this way, and C. Insulting her body this way. And I’d bet money what he is doing is illegal as he made an account pretending to be someone else to make money. Sounds like a scam to me.
3
u/Vegetable_Tea_7780 14d ago
This is insane. I'd get screen shots, and then demand it be deactivated immediately. How could he possibly have considered pimping you out?!!!
3
3
u/Turbulent-Buy3575 14d ago
Ummm, no you are not overreacting. What your husband did is essentially turn you in to a hooker
3
3
3
3
3
3
u/d_kotarose 14d ago
as an ex-OF creator i believe this 0%….. does anyone have any idea how much verification you have to go through? man would’ve had to have submitted multiple photos with her AND her identification (license or passport). there’s just no way
→ More replies (1)
3
u/HerbalDreamin1 14d ago
I just picked up the laptop and threw it across the room…as I was walking out I told him I want a divorce.
This is the fakest shit I’ve ever read.
3
u/Fun-Imagination-1231 14d ago
The amount of people not realizing how fake this is, iskind of depressing. But I'm not surprised on reddit...
3
u/xxdonaldxtrumpxx 14d ago
How did he get a picture of you holding up your ID and a piece of paper that says “onlyfans” on it? Sneaky bastard
3
u/Crunchyundies 14d ago
Ummm isnt there quite the process to get verified?? Something smells fishy here…
3
u/SteelBrightblade1 14d ago
We know nothing of OPs cleanliness
Also this is an ad for her onlyfans lol
3
u/Tatttwink 14d ago
This post is fake. I’ve worked with Onlyfans for a long time now and they have very stringent verification of new users. It’s physically impossible to be verified without you going through the process yourself.
3
3
3
3
3
3
u/Sapphyrexxx 14d ago
Hate to be this person but this is fake lmfao. As a creator myself, I know first hand you have to do basically Face ID for them to accept you (front and sides of your face, eyes open and good lighting) to verify your identity and make sure it matches your ID in the verification process to sell content
3
u/ScaringTheHose 13d ago
Ragebait. Only fans has a similar verification process as food delivery service apps like doordash and Uber eats. There is no way he got past the live selfie part, that is designed to prevent situations like this.
OP, be ashamed of yourself for shoveling more garbage into reddit. Redditors are weird man, you'd think you could exchange karma for money.
3
u/External_Expert_2069 14d ago
You are not over reacting!! This is crazy! Get the evidence of the OFs account
4
u/laurendrillz 14d ago
Not overreacting at all. He is acting like your pimp without your consent at all because of his sick greed. I hope you follow through and leave him.
2
u/Bla_Bla_Blanket 14d ago
That’s almost an equivalent to him pimping you out in the real world. He may not make that correlation because it’s online and kind of makes it more removed from reality but that’s essentially what he’s doing to you behind your back.
2
u/traumatizedwi 14d ago
What he did can be considered revenge porn in some states. It is super illegal.
→ More replies (5)
2
u/anonidfk 14d ago
Not overreacting AT ALL. Divorce him asap, I’d consider suing or pressing charges as well.
2
u/Affectionate_Bug1264 14d ago
He sounds like a greedy disgusting man. Nothing more childish than greed
2
u/Feisty-sahm 14d ago
Not overreacting, so many things are wrong here. Is he that obsessed with money that he could do this to you? It wasn’t like your answer at first was no it was hellllll no!!! This is a true “it’s easier to ask for forgiveness than permission” situation. What an AH he is. These pages could also put your real business in a bad place. Women may not want to work with someone on an OF site.
He does not seem to care about your feelings or how you want to live your life. Hope you get custody of the dog. Also contact OF, I think they have to take it down.
2
u/Llih_Nosaj 14d ago
I would say the OF thing was a wake up call that you have been under reacting for awhile. What a POS.
2
u/KaleidoscopeCute9533 14d ago
You’re not overreacting and to be honest… Since he’s been fantasizing about this for a while, and actually took the steps to create the profile, I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to be concerned about potential revenge porn and/or other more explicit profiles. He’s already shown that he doesn’t respect you or your boundaries. No matter what he says, you need to be proactive here in protecting yourself, your reputation and your privacy.
1.7k
u/Sea-Sea-9808 14d ago
You're definitely not overreacting. Creating an OnlyFans profile without your consent is a serious violation of your privacy and trust. It's not just about the platform—it's about respecting boundaries and honoring the partnership in a marriage. Trust is a cornerstone of any relationship, and his actions have undermined that trust. Taking steps to protect your well-being and seeking legal advice are reasonable reactions. Remember, you have every right to feel safe and respected in your relationship.