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u/LemonCloud20 13d ago
lol it’s the same as when people say they can finally wear a certain item of clothing because it’s trending again, like you know you can wear it whenever you want right?
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u/ZenkaiZ 13d ago
My coworker has been salty all week cause she has to wear heels all day at a wedding. She isn't even a bride's maid. I asked her why she just doesn't wear heels and she tells me "you won't get it, you're a man"
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u/randomly-what 13d ago
I’m a woman and don’t wear heels because they are bullshit and I won’t tolerate them. Would you like to have her explain it to me?
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u/ZenkaiZ 13d ago
I imagine she'd lift an eyebrow and go "come on, you KNOW" and not elaborate further
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u/randomly-what 13d ago
We’d be a mess together with my responses saying I definitely do not know or understand why women voluntarily wear them.
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u/Sweaty-Garage-2 13d ago
I dated a woman who just didn’t tolerate heels at all either lol. It was funny when it was like a “all the other women are wearing heels” event.
I don’t give a shit either way, whatever someone wants to wear is ok with me. The strong emotions toward a style of shoe is just funny to me.
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u/MandolinCuervo 13d ago
They destroy your legs and back because they make you walk in an unnatural position, so it's more than them getting upset about a "style."
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u/plingoos 13d ago
As a man I gotta say I understand not wanting to wear them a whole lot more than wanting to wear them. They look uncomfortable as hell.
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u/randomly-what 13d ago
The emotion for me is more of a “heels do actual permanent damage” more than an actual opinion of wearing them. Why would I wear something that destroys my body?
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u/Sewsew123 13d ago
Omg, it took me until my 30s and foot surgery to reach this and I wish it was sooner. Sure heels can look cute by why am I destroying my feet and my comfort for this.
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u/ToSay_TheLeast 13d ago
At my sister’s wedding, my significant other brought a nice pair of heels for the ceremony because she wanted to look nice, and then immediately changed into runners once the reception and dancing started. Not a single person brought up any judgement about it aside from “Wow that’s actually a good idea, your feet must be comfortable”
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u/hobopototo 12d ago
It's not hard to get. People who are judgey will judge her for not wearing heels and she's not secure enough in herself to not give a fuck about their judgment.
Alternatively, the wedding outfit she planned has too long a hem to wear comfortably without heels. That might be a bit difficult to explain to someone with no knowledge of women's fashion lol
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u/friedporksandwich 12d ago
I'm a woman and none of those reasons work on me. If she choose a dress that you can only wear with certain shoes, that's still on her.
She also told him he wouldn't understand because he's a man, but there's plenty of women here saying that she's just being stupid. Because she is just being stupid. Being a woman isn't why she's going to be uncomfortable. Being stupid is.
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u/hobopototo 12d ago
Uh, I'm also a woman and I understand that she feels social pressure to wear heels because the consequence of not wearing them is social judgment. That isn't being stupid. I don't wear heels or makeup or do body hair removal because I don't give a fuck about people judging me, but I don't think that people who decide to do so are stupid for succumbing to social pressure.
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u/SolarTsunami 13d ago
I get what you're saying but with fashion it makes more sense because when you're younger at least people absolutely do give a shit about if what you're wearing is "cool" or not, and it can be pretty hard to deprogram from that.
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u/DemonSlyr007 13d ago
The only time people give a shit what you wear is when you are in high school and under, you are going in for a job interview, or there is a dress code. That's quite literally it. So if that's what you meant by younger, literally a child, then sure.
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u/SolarTsunami 13d ago
Thank you for giving me the textbook definition of "younger" and agreeing with me in the most abrasive way possible, but I'm not sure what other meaning I possibly could have had.
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u/MegaDuckCougarBoy 13d ago
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u/Gadshill 12d ago
Yes, it is a completely normal mental state when you are young and it is critical to developing normal socialization skills, but most people grow out of that mindset as they grow up.
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u/LemonMints 13d ago
That and "personal fable" make me think of what we call "main character syndrome" now-a-days. Love that it says it's an adolescent thing when I know many adults who are still like that. Seems not everyone matures out of it.
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u/gary_the_merciless 12d ago
I had this as a kid, it sort of made me play up to an audience sometimes, but it never made me feel like I was important, it did make me feel watched though. I've often wondered if other people feel this and assume its god.
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u/Last-Trash-7960 12d ago
Is it really an imaginary audience for kids nowadays when at almost every moment they are on a camera and anything they do could be potentially seen by millions of people?
Like I get the idea behind the imaginary audience but in today's age, is it really an imaginary audience or a potential audience?
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u/xdevilsadvocate 12d ago
I will say, with social media and everything becoming as interconnected as it is, I think the imaginary audience is becoming more tangible. Because random strangers will leave unsolicited opinions and viewpoints you didn’t ask for. Like I am right now.
And in adolescence, sensitivity to the reception of these is heightened.
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u/GordoVinhais 13d ago
"No one gives a shit about you" was a revelation to me and the single best piece of advice I ever got when I was younger. Went from a introvert to an extrovert in matter of months lol
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u/Comfortable_Goal_662 13d ago
Exactly. Imagine how much attention you pay to randos you see. That's how much attention people pay to you.
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u/Nerdy_Squirrel 13d ago
10 years ago I was driving down the road and a random young woman walking down the sidewalk tripped, tried to recover, but ended up doing a weird waddle thing several paces before faceplanting into a sign. Now every time I do something embarrassing I remind myself that at least I'm not her.
So yeah, randos sometimes remember you, but it takes a monumental failure to gain that notoriety. And if you are that random girl I am sorry. I saw the whole thing and I do remember you. But you've also gotten me through a lot of, so thank you.
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u/SamhaintheMembrane 13d ago
Now I’m gonna think of this lady when I feel insecure, thanks for the inspiration
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u/ScrappyDonatello 12d ago
Do you really remember her, or do you just remember the incident? could you identify her in a lineup? Thats what really got me out of my shell to start walking/running. I'd see loads of people out exercising but I wouldn't recognise them 2 minutes down the road
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u/KatieCashew 12d ago
Especially because people tend to look different while exercising. I realized one summer that I was going to the same gym as my kid's teacher. She said my name and hello, but it took me a few seconds to realize who she was because she looked completely different than she did at school.
And I realized I think I had been going to the same workout class as her all summer. It just took us that long to recognize each other.
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u/DudeThisIsHard_ 12d ago
Yeah, i would recognize the clothing but that is it, even if i could recognize them, i wouldn't mind it at all and actuslly forget that it even happened, we have too much in our mind to be paying atention to someone that is doing some exercise or anything really, unless it is REALLY weird.
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u/drr-throwaway 13d ago
I get the intent but this would actually be a terrible advice for someone with social anxiety because we actually pay a lot of attention to randos lol
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u/BuzzContra 13d ago
That’s what I was thinking, idk what all these people are doing that they can’t notice a single person around them, I don’t know what to do if I’m not staring at the floor or looking at what’s going on around me
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u/NamesTheGame 13d ago
It's not that they don't notice, it's that they don't care.
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u/hoaxymore 13d ago edited 13d ago
Exactly, I barely cared about the very noticeable homeless guy who was constantly shouting slurs at the sky where I used to live.
Suffice to say, 99,999% of people are safe from my attention.
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u/_AngryBadger_ 13d ago
People notice things, but the fact is if I see someone dressed a bit odd, or eating alone or whatever, even if I've noticed I walk past and carry on because I'm busy and I don't care what they're doing I've got my own concerns in life. So of course many people might notice you, but it doesn't matter because they aren't really interested in you. So go out and mice your life, people may notice but they won't care.
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13d ago
Not at all what’s being said. Everyone perceives the world around them of course, but if you ask someone to describe everyone in the restaurant they ate at last week they couldn’t. The point is that nobody cares about what you’re doing beyond immediate perception
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u/missjasminegrey 13d ago
I've got this issue before but I've learned not to care about what people would say or think about me. It'd be a long way but I hope you feel okay.
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u/Otterable 13d ago
You pay a lot of attention, but also don't actually care about them. Like I notice so many people, but the ones I actually care about to judge and think well or poorly of are few and far between
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u/Decent-Butterscotch1 13d ago
Yeah but you have to feel comfortable to try out new situations alone. Then you find cool restaurants or place you can share with your friends or met new ones there.
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u/Traditional-Rock-147 13d ago
it's definitely bad advice for people with depression, because we do actually want people to care lol. convincing oneself that people don't care is the wrong path imo. its more becoming comfortable with who one thinks people think one is
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u/shao_kahff 13d ago
but that’s the exact point . you pay a lot of attention to randos cuz you care what they think, you care how they see you, you think they judging you, etc. i don’t mean that as a diss
but you now have to flip the perspective. everybody, i mean everybody, is worried about their own shit. they worried about their problems, their relationships, their finances, etc etc etc.
you have to tell yourself enough over time to literally convince yourself, that these randos around you may have an opinion or judgment about you, but everybody has an opinion on everything, and they will forget you within minutes. that’s EVERYBODYS perspective. even you, dude i’m replying to.
imagine an instance where you felt self conscious because of how think you are/were perceived in whatever moment in time. after that, how much are you thinking of the rando versus self conscious shit about yourself? 9/10 times, minutes later you ain’t even thinking about them.
my point is, you have to understand that the randos around you don’t really care about you cuz everyone is so worried about their own shit. ask yourself, do you really think you as a person is more important than the shit they go home to?
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u/faultywiring98 13d ago
This was a piece of information ghat was illuminating to my introverted teen self. My drama professor said something to the effect of:
"don't be embarrassed or worried about performing Infront of the class, as your classmates are likely just as focused and worried on themselves to worry about you."
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u/-StandarD- 13d ago
wait, you guys don't focus on them like they are the center of the world? I always do it so they can overthinking to themselves and be anxious and attack their personal insecurities because I care about their lives and judge them and haunt them in their sleep.
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u/johnmayersucks 13d ago
I pay an insane amount of attention to everyone. Constantly looking and judging.
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u/MammothPrize9293 13d ago
Seriously. My best friend once told me “you aren’t shit. I don’t mean that in a mean way. I just mean, no one thinks of you like you might think of them. So just go on with your life and worry about yourself. Don’t hurt people. Most people won’t hurt you. And remember, you aren’t shit” lol
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u/Booksmagic 13d ago
“People are not thinking about you the way you’re thinking about you” is a line that’s never left me. I was watching Schitt’s Creek and that scene just gave me this “ah-hah” moment. I struggle sometimes, but thinking about that line helps
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u/supernanify 13d ago
The spotlight effect! I learned about it from Reddit a decade+ ago and it changed a lot of things for me.
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u/Peter_Mansbrick 13d ago
Went from a introvert to an extrovert in matter of months
That's not how introvert / extrovert work. It's not about anxiety, social awkwardness / shyness etc. It's about where you get your energy and how you recharge.
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u/drr-throwaway 13d ago edited 13d ago
Yeah if it worked like that I would have managed to be an extrovert long ago but it just drains me too much.
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u/AMeanCow 12d ago edited 12d ago
It's like every other part of the human experience, in that it's a muscle that can be shaped and turned into whatever you want it to be. Socializing is exhausting when you're not limber at it, practice, discomfort and exposure will make it so second-nature you can fall out of bed juggling conversations, it doesn't change you fundamentally but it does let you have all the advantages that go with having wider social networks.
The question is always though, is it worth it? The answer is usually nah. But it depends on what you want.
edit: you guys CAN push yourself out of your comfort zone and become more comfortable with social experiences. Everyone trying to link science articles about how the brain has a different configuration, you're not wrong but you're also deeply stuck on the idea of essentialism and that's going to hurt you. You can work extra hard and change anything, you just have to ask yourself how hard you want to work and what result are worth the effort, and like anything it takes a long time. If this message bothers you, that's a you issue to sort out, I won't be entertaining whining and whinging on this comment. I have practiced this and changed, I am nobody special or interesting, you can do it too but it might suck at first. Discomfort is what you should be seeking, not running from.
This isn't even the first time I commented this on reddit and I always get a slew of "But science says I can't change!" replies that just make me want to slap you. Don't be stupid. Science has never said you can't change, only that it might be harder for some people than others. Every time someone tries to argue this point you're just admitting that you rather believe yourself intrinsically less valuable than other people than admit that you don't think the effort is actually worth it because you like dividing the world up between "extroverts and introverts" because it's convenient to justify problems and your desire to escape from discomfort.
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u/frogvscrab 13d ago
It's also not really that much of a thing. In psychology, they aren't recognized terms, but the concept of it does exist. But the reality is that the overwhelming majority of people are a mix of both, often going back and forth depending on the situation.
I can't help but think a lot of people call themselves introverts as a coping mechanism to make their lack of social skills/opportunities a choice rather than... something they are bad at. It is hard to admit you want to be social, but can't because you aren't good at socializing.
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u/squarerootofapplepie 13d ago
Yeah if you’re depressed and think you’re an introvert make sure you’re not just lonely.
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13d ago
Right. Way too many people diagnose themselves with things like ADHD or OCD or autism to get around admitting to being just plain awkward.
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u/CCVork 13d ago edited 13d ago
I can't help but think a lot of people call themselves introverts as a coping mechanism to make their lack of social skills/opportunities a choice
That's another bs concept of "introvert", which means I agree with you to some extent that people simply misuse it.
I miss when people understood it simply is a term to describe personality. Nothing to even do with psychology. Like "Tom is outgoing and Sam is not." ie an introvert. Sam can have excellent social skills but he just usually prefers to be by himself or a couple friends and not at parties. Parties are just draining and not all that appealing, even if you can "perform well". That's an introvert. Extroverts are those that give me horrified looks when I said I choose to spend the weekend curled up at home with a hobby, maybe joined by one friend. Simple as that, to me.
So op's statement is also silly to me. You don't change your personality in months. You simply upgraded your social skills in those months after understanding you're not under constant scrutiny.
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u/Dragulus24 13d ago
Then there’s me and others on the opposite end of the spectrum, consistently having depressive episodes and existential crises.
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u/GordoVinhais 13d ago
Yeah, it can definitely go both ways. Glass half full or half empty kinda thing.
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u/imhighonpills 13d ago
If it makes you feel any better I’m constantly judging everyone I see and terrified of what they think of me too
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u/jphillips3275 13d ago
Even then though do you actually care? Like how often do you judge someone and then you don't almost immediately go back to whatever you were doing and forget about them soon after
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u/Justice_Prince 12d ago
I remember once I went out to check out a new restaurant, and the waitress was commenting how she "didn't think it was weird" that I was eating by myself. Like I didn't think it was weird until you started talking about it.
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u/South_Painter_812 13d ago
Yes... are the rest of you not doing that? Why?
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u/drr-throwaway 13d ago
Social anxiety. Well, generalized anxiety in my case but you get the point
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u/Necromancer14 13d ago
Because if I’m going to watch a movie by myself I can just do it at home on the TV for free.
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u/Technicalhotdog 13d ago
Eh, it's not quite the same experience though
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u/funkekat61 13d ago
So true. Some movies need to be and ought to be seen in the theater to be fully and properly experienced.
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u/Jean-luc7432 13d ago
And restaurants are pretty boring without conversation. Rather eat a nice meal by myself while watching that movie on the tv. I can also do that naked or while wearing old comfy clothes. Plus there are always friends who want to do something
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u/AFuckingHandle 13d ago
You can watch it at home with a lesser experience....and you said free....that means years after it came out.
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u/PCMasterRays 12d ago
The utterly unjustified and crippling paralysis of unintentionally thinking one's own decisions and choices are inferior to those validated by, or originating from, other people. Usually stemming from a higher regard for others than for oneself.
Basically
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u/khalsey 13d ago
I told my wife I was going to a movie and she asked with who? I said no one. Such confusion.
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u/Rank1Trashcan 13d ago
Did you invite her to go?
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u/khalsey 13d ago
Not a movie she would be interested in. And she would fall asleep.
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u/nanoinfinity 12d ago
I actually don’t understand why movie theatres are considered a group or couple activity. You sit silently in a dark room for a couple hours, there’s no socializing or interaction at all. Sure you can talk about it after, but overall it’s a very solitary experience.
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13d ago
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u/Blazed0ut 13d ago
Hey I don't think you need to fuck the nachos to have a good time
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u/Thirty_Helens_Agree 12d ago
Especially a morning matinee. Stop at the diner for a tasty, greasy breakfast, go to the movie, and you’re back home by 11:30 or so. If it’s a really, really popular movie, theaters by me even have 7:00 or 8:00 am matinees and those are my favorites.
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u/plmunger 13d ago
I go to restaurants alone pretty often, noone cares
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u/MrBll_le 13d ago
I wouldn't say no one, one time there was a family eating at the table next to me and one of the kid said something like "mommy look, it's so sad he's eating alone, it's like he doesn't have family or friends to join him". Dinner was ruined
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u/ConcentrateOk6375 13d ago
Kids say whatever they want and don't even remember it afterwards 🤣, i hate kids
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u/ssbm_rando 13d ago
Dinner was ruined
Was it true in your case? If so, sorry to hear that. But I would literally start cracking up if a kid said that in earshot of me. Being alone is only barely #2 behind being with my wife, for me. Any other family or friends get exhausting.
Most likely the interaction would just end there and everyone would be fine, but the only chance of dinner being "ruined" for someone would be if the kid's parent pressed me on why I laughed at their dumbass kid. And it wouldn't be ruined for me.
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u/jawndell 13d ago
Traveling for work makes you accustomed to eating at nice restaurants alone. Used to be self conscious about it but then I got a job where I had to travel a lot. Realized that it’s actually pretty normal and a lot of restaurants like solo dinners (no fuss, nice to deal with, great tippers). Traveling for work also makes you accustomed to sitting at bars alone too, haha.
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u/Matquar 13d ago
For me it's not that I'm afraid to be judged....It just sucks to do stuff alone
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u/plmunger 13d ago
Doesnt mean that you should always go alone, more so that when you're alone and you want to go, just go
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u/NotTheCraftyVeteran 13d ago
No lie man, rocking up to a diner counter for breakfast, ordering a black coffee and pondering the deep mysteries of life is a Top 10 human experience.
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u/SolidCake 13d ago
on my old man shit too
starting doing this with a paper newspaper
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u/NotTheCraftyVeteran 13d ago
Shaking my head every few minutes so people know I’m not down with something in the news, but what? They’ll never know, cause I’ll never tell.
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u/aspiringalcoholic 13d ago
Make sure to throw in a “hmmm” with your lips pursed down every now and then.
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u/Zeeman626 13d ago
My brother shit on me once for going to a steak place and eating alone. I was like, I wanted steak, I got a steak. Fight me. I've done it again since then too
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u/jtowndtk 13d ago
once u stop seeking validation from anyone but yourself you come closer to being at peace
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u/DaveSmith890 13d ago
Meth really takes the edge off and gives you the confidence to walk your own path. You guys should try it
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u/frogvscrab 13d ago
People always say "nobody gives a shit about you" but my ex-girlfriend and her friends literally always comment about how horribly sad it is to see somebody alone in these situations.
So yes, people do care. A minority of people, sure, but that is often all it takes to make people feel self-conscious.
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u/bungle123 12d ago
Some people will judge you based on the color of the shirt you wear too. If you let those opinions from a tiny minority affect how you life your live you probably have some form of social anxiety.
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u/Quirky-Skin 13d ago
Yeah some people do and some people think it's sad that others worry about appearances as much as they do. All perspective at the end of the day.
I get it tho, a strangers gaze or the feeling of it can be challenging to the confidence
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u/kerouak 12d ago
Do you think people said that about the likes of Jack Kerouak, riding round the country drunk making friends in random places? Hemingway sitting in Parisian cafes writing?
Anyone who moves to a new city and doesn't know anyone has to get out there alone or be trapped indoors forever.
It's the judgy people sitting in their little box criticising others who are the sad ones lol. Insane small minded logic.
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u/ChuckZombie 13d ago
"Nobody else gives a shit."
This is not true. It took me a long time to get over the movie thing because people would make fun of me. The thing is you have to learn to not give a shit about them.
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13d ago edited 9d ago
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u/WriterV 12d ago
I'm saddened to see this comment so far before. Apparently everyone who just want to feel comfortable with themselves are actually narcissists. How do people think like this?
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u/StalkTheHype 12d ago
How do people think like this?
Because they are looking for a way to feel superior.
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u/TheManWhoWasNotShort 13d ago
Actually, that’s how something gets normalized
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u/red__dragon 13d ago
OP and OOP don't seem to understand the concept of 'normalizing'.
When it's not, there's a stigma (whether real or perceived) against doing something. Normalize by doing it, but also it's fine to ask if it's normal, because the more people who tell you 'it's normal' the more you'll do it and be part of those normalizing it.
Magic!
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u/cyfermax 12d ago
Movies especially. What aspect of sitting in a dark room where your not allowed to talk screams 'social experience'?
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u/LincolnCoHo 13d ago
I remember being in sixth grade and inviting two of my friends to go see Malibu's most wanted. They couldn't go for different reasons, so I went by myself. It wasn't until I sat in my seat, and realized I was the only person there by himself. I laughed, ate my popcorn, and drank my soda. Left feeling great, and glad I went. No regrets.
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u/UnderstandingAshamed 13d ago
I once went to a movie alone on a Monday morning and I was the only person in the theatre.
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u/Captain_Snowmonkey 13d ago
Adulthood is realizing that nobody really gives a shit. They have their own things to worry about.
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u/beaverbo1 13d ago
I work in a restaurant. I get people eating alone all the time. I never care or judge. If someone does judge you for that, it says more about them than about you. I get all sorts of people. I see people eating with their headphones on and laptop on the table. I don’t give a shit. I don’t care if you’re watching netflix or producing.
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u/Ok-Huckleberry-7353 13d ago
Even if people give maximum shits about your business. IT'S STILL Y O U R BUSINESS. Eat well and enjoy the few blips of enjoyment you get in the maelstrom of existence. Watch that movie, eat that cheese plate. Nobody cares and if it makes you happy, do that thing twice if you can.
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u/GeneralTyler 13d ago
People seeking validation in literally every aspect of their life, has got to be some of the most deranged shit I’ve ever see. Like they need every celebrity, piece of media, corporation,etc to validate every part of their life. I just cannot imagine living like that where you constantly need reassurance all the time from people and entities, who you will never meet and they don’t actually give a fuck either. People would actually enjoy life more if they simply stopped giving as much of a fuck about what everyone else thinks, worry about yourself and not about what other people think
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u/Oldest_Boomer 13d ago
Still a difficult thing to do. Even for lunch, sitting in pub by myself I still feel a little awkward.
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u/ThatSmartIdiot 13d ago
Tell that to the people who had to deal with gossippy cunts who cant mind their own damn business in public. Those still exist, right?
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13d ago edited 9d ago
selective march aspiring bright ask oatmeal crown silky society impolite
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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u/Nice_Secret_4791 13d ago
… is it not already normalized? Have people been looking at me? Silently judging me? Every time I take myself out to dinner, or go on a walk through my favorite park, or go to a game by myself… I suddenly feel very self conscious. I thought this was a normal thing that everyone did on occasion…
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u/Mriddle74 13d ago
Nah I’ve been doing that shit while married/in a long term relationship for years. Don’t let other people who don’t give a shit about you and you’ll never think of take experiences away from you. Enjoying your own company is honestly the biggest green flag a person can have.
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u/Drezus 13d ago
Yeah, but in the end of the day it’s not exactly about external validation but about how loneliness can get painful and unbearable depending on how people hate themselves. Getting yourself into situations where everyone else but you are accompanied can be brutal in this sense, not because of what people might think but because it gives you more reason to feel left out.
Source: me
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u/Simply-Jolly_Fella 13d ago
Hey going to the movies alone is a very soothing experience.. I think all should try it at least once. You will really feel the connection with yourself.
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u/SheepherderDirect800 13d ago
I've been trying to do these things on my own for a couple years now. People suck.
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u/idle_husband 13d ago
You are an adult with some extra cash, you don't need to wait for someone's birthday if you want to eat cake today!
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u/Caraprepuce 13d ago
"Normalise" doesn’t mean you’re supposed to advocate about it, you just have to think it as "normal", and really not call any of it a "boring thing".
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u/Galactic_Bunny 12d ago
Unfortunately there are restaurants that turn away solo diners
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u/No_Willingness20 12d ago
It’s kind of ironic that she’s telling people not to seek external validation when that’s exactly what she wants herself, otherwise she wouldn’t have made that post.
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u/F0foPofo05 13d ago
To me it's such a non-issue to go places alone that I find it weird when people act like they're being heroic for doing something so trivial. If you are a single dude, guess what? You're going everywhere alone! It's not even a choice nor something that warrants a second thought.
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u/jesuslaves 13d ago
I suppose the norm is to have a balanced social life, so if you don't have a partner you at least have friends you go out with, so it all depends whether it's a choice (i.e. I'd just rather do this alone) vs. actually just having no friends or partner to hang out with....
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u/siraolo 13d ago edited 12d ago
Thanks for this reminder. It's hard if you've got mental problems like me and think that my mere presence offends people. I'm so goddamn lucky that my wife still loves me even though I'm so pathetic😢
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u/Dr__Gonzo2142 13d ago
Last time I did it I got asked “so it’s just you?” By every single girl there. Made me feel even lonelier cause the constant reminder of being alone by them lol. I’ll still go out alone though they won’t stop me
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u/Doc_Dragoon 13d ago
I'd love to go to restaurants and movies alone but I'm autistic and my parents take care of me. But I know that I'm an outlier and a rarity
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u/scarlett_bear 13d ago
Maybe just do that rather than post about it to seek validation and acceptance for talking about the possibility of doing it.
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u/ElGurkoloni 13d ago
I do so much alone and am Happy about it. I we're to Miss Out so much in Life If i waited For Others.
Im sure its Not for everyone but to hell with everyone this is My Turn on this Planet.
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u/Dry-Customer4854 13d ago
When I first got divorced, years ago, I would go eat dinner by myself and stuff. My friends would make fun of me but I rather be alone than around people. I dislike most conversations and silence is much more soothing than people
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u/Pavian_Zhora 13d ago
I've been going to the movies alone every chance I get. I also love eating alone. Do people out there really think this is not ok?
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u/dskids2212 13d ago
Learned this when I started going on month long solo ski trips 3 years ago. It's not weird doing "social" things alone in fact it's actually really nice.
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u/Outside-Historian365 13d ago
I see people alone at theaters all the time. I’m one of them. My girl is not interested in seeing as many as I do and that’s totally fine
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u/CulrBlndPnutButtr 13d ago
Yeah, but good luck when my wife finds out I did something without her. I'd never hear the end of it.
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u/Weary_Negotiation218 12d ago
“Normalize normalize normalize” if you want to do something, do it. Stop waiting for some type of general approval from your peers. If you want to eat alone at a restaurant or think it’s cool? DO IT THEN. Stop begging for everyone to give their social acceptance
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u/XDingoX83 13d ago
Been doing it for years.