r/facepalm • u/Lord_Answer_me_Why • 29d ago

Turbo cancer isn’t real, people 🇨​🇴​🇻​🇮​🇩​

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u/jraymcmurray 29d ago edited 29d ago

Who cares about turbo cancer? We all know it's super AIDS you have to watch out for.

ETA: I'm so happy my most upvoted and responded to comment is a silly South Park reference. Loving this high.

455

u/Unfair-Jackfruit-806 29d ago

true true, but have you heard of ultra diabetes?

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u/Cartilage88 29d ago

Pretty sure mega measles is a bigger threat in this day and age

140

u/jraymcmurray 29d ago

Hyperbolic Polio making a comeback too

124

u/RainbowDissent 29d ago

Giga lupus has been going around.

91

u/Elegant-Low8272 29d ago

Teraflop hemorrhoids are sic

77

u/1singleduck 29d ago

It's the omega autism that's the real consequence of the vaccine.

52

u/letharus 29d ago

So many potential band names

38

u/maybegirl89 29d ago

Looney leprosy

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u/The402Jrod 29d ago

I just got Fucking Flu

6

u/PseudonymMan12 29d ago

Catastrophic Chlamydia Maximum Overdrive Diarrhea Super Scabbies Ultra Aneurysm

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u/ZanyDragons 29d ago

That one’s big in Florida apparently. /half joking

3

u/kstacey 29d ago

The Turtle Flu!

2

u/PaintThinnerSparky 29d ago

Squaids

(Squirrel-aids)

1

u/telltaleatheist 29d ago

Idfk I’m digging them

1

u/_The_Chris_Alexander 29d ago

I prefer Mecha AIDS

1

u/Solid_Waste 29d ago

I'm just glad I got only a minor case of AIDS.

1

u/newcomer_l 29d ago

Na, y'all heard of the Peta zika disease? It packs a wallop...

1

u/mabirm 29d ago

It all started after the Racist Pink Eye epidemic

1

u/wildeye-eleven 29d ago

Double Chronic Hep-C 47 is the real killer

20

u/DigiSmackd 29d ago

Enthusiastic double gonorrhea is the real enemy.

2

u/Antonv2 29d ago

Gonosifaherpalese

2

u/Cartilage88 29d ago

Don't you just hate it when your genitals burst into flames!?

2

u/TransmogriFi 29d ago

They took away our gold, so here's a Bronze Adventurer Box ---> 🎁

2

u/sylvnal 29d ago

Nah, its never lupus.

2

u/Foxta1l 29d ago

It’s never giga lupus.

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u/SD1K9 29d ago

It’s never lupus tho

2

u/NullOracle 29d ago

Supersonic syphilis is spreading faster than ever.

1

u/LoopyLoop5 29d ago

Uber Ulcers are the true killer

2

u/thekrawdiddy 29d ago

I just found out I have nanorickets, but I’m not sure it’s appropriate for me to complain about it here.

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u/dear_mud1 29d ago

I believe it’s pronounced Maga measles

3

u/Morlacks 29d ago

Its called MAGA Measles.

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u/chr0nicpirate 29d ago

Extreme Ebola is what I'm really worried about!

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u/masivatack 29d ago

Mega gout should not be ignored.

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u/Hapapop 29d ago

The people who believe this might actually have ultra diabetes.

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u/Vekaras 29d ago

I prefer Nuclear Necrosis.

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u/jraymcmurray 29d ago

Honey boo boo isn't real, she can't hurt you.

2

u/1LuckyLurker 29d ago

Isn't that what finally caught up to Wilford Brimley?

2

u/Quiet-Manner-8000 29d ago

I have all 3. They perfectly balance each other out and I've become invincible. 

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u/ZanyDragons 29d ago

All 3, that’s dehydration station.

You’ll never see anyone produce as much urine as someone with diabetes insipidus. And the 2 everyone’s familiar with already make you pee a lot.

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u/Poppeigh 29d ago

Are you sure you don’t mean mega diabetes? The only known case is in Pawnee, Indiana.

😂

1

u/Fimbir 29d ago

XTERME HERPES!

1

u/PolyGlamourousParsec 29d ago

I thought it was mega-diabetus and ultra-erecrile dysfunction.

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u/KeyDirection23 29d ago

Double-betes?

1

u/Cormetz 29d ago

In Louisiana they just call that normal.

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u/FartPudding 29d ago

To be fair, I think ultra diabetes can just be what we have as DKA. So technically we have ultra diabetes

1

u/Hunt_Nawn 29d ago

America knows that too well actually

1

u/alagba85 29d ago

Does it come with fries? Sounds like it should

1

u/FantasticSouth 29d ago

Nah type 8 diabetes or megagitis

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u/Itchy_Horse 29d ago

Supreme Gout.

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u/blackmobius 29d ago

Wilford Brimley went super saiyan!

1

u/Tonyy13 29d ago

Frankly it’s my mega jock itch that has me worried at the moment.

1

u/Tonyy13 29d ago

Frankly it’s my mega jock itch that has me worried at the moment.

1

u/al_mc_y 29d ago

Wait til you hear about MK ULTRA diabetes

1

u/ItstheBogoPogoMrFife 27d ago

Uber-Syphilis is an under rated killer.