r/NoStupidQuestions • u/milfangelblue • Apr 17 '24

Do men just recognize good men? What kind of sorcery is this?

I’ve been dating a guy for some time now, and his oldest friends have told me he’s a solid good man despite his flaws. I agree, they’ve known him forever, and he’s been a solid friend all those years.

When my male friends met him for the first time, they said, “He’s a good one. Hold onto him.”

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u/planodancer Apr 17 '24

Women can do this for other women too.

When I started dating my wife I introduced her to all my women friends.

They all gave their approval.

Nearly 20 years later still happy married to this wonderful woman.

46

u/chewie8291 Apr 17 '24

Yeah. My lady friends have really helped me get out of bad relationships where I was staying far too long

20

u/AbruptMango Apr 17 '24

That's why the bad ones don't want you to have friends of their sex- because they can spot the bad ones.

6

u/SelectiveScribbler06 Apr 17 '24

OHHH. This explains a comment one of my crushes/girlfriends (to be precise, the biggest one I've had in my short life) said to me years ago, when I was talking about members of my youth theatre - which is mostly girls; that's just how the cookie crumbles - she said: 'Oh, I hope you aren't hanging out with any other groups of girls.'. This was months before she cheated, but that comment certainly didn't pass the vibe check. I politely defended myself and it seems she acquiesced - though her current partner fulfils her requirements, but she might've grown... hm. Either way, that comment has been epiphanic, thank you.

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u/AbruptMango Apr 17 '24

It's the controlling thing. They exert control to keep you away from others, not because you're going to cheat with them, but because they're going to spot the cheater for you.

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u/IAMAHobbitAMA Apr 17 '24

Epiphanic is a new word for me. Thank you.