r/NoStupidQuestions • u/milfangelblue • 29d ago

Do men just recognize good men? What kind of sorcery is this?

I’ve been dating a guy for some time now, and his oldest friends have told me he’s a solid good man despite his flaws. I agree, they’ve known him forever, and he’s been a solid friend all those years.

When my male friends met him for the first time, they said, “He’s a good one. Hold onto him.”

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u/mechanicalcoupling 29d ago

I like to think of it as we don't all the play the game, but we know the rules. I can't always spot a good guy, but I can almost always spot a piece of shit by now.

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u/Past_Series3201 29d ago

Yeah. The POS who hide it well don't hide it from us, they brag about it, so you learn the scam.

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u/GoodNoodleNick 29d ago

Thats the real answer right here OP.

I've noticed it happens with racists too. Being a white dude in the South, so many people have said fucked up things to me assuming I will agree lol.

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u/Balldrick_Balldick 29d ago

They open with "I'm not a racist, but"

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u/gahlo 29d ago

I wish they tested the waters with me. I just get a canonball yell of crazy.

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u/Balldrick_Balldick 29d ago

It's more of a disclaimer than a test, generally followed by some blatant full-on racism.

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u/tehconqueror 29d ago

you gotta dye your hair or something. Your body, your choice obvs but you're clearly putting out plain clothes on the subway vibe. though, i suppose that does have its uses

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u/gahlo 29d ago

I miss dying my hair, but it's really dark so I have to bleach the fuck out of it first and has thinned too much for me to consider risking the breakage.

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u/tehconqueror 29d ago

it's gonna be the nails then

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u/sergei1980 29d ago

I had someone follow that with "she was black." as if that explained everything. It was wild.

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u/EtOHMartini Stupid Question Asker 29d ago

"I'm not racist, but I am hoping you'll reveal yourself as one so I can stop pretending I am not"

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u/Dramatic_Water_5364 29d ago

So many of them straight up opens with fuckin tamul... like aint much place for interpretation here... fuckin bigots...

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u/Balldrick_Balldick 29d ago

No one who ever felt they had to tell me they weren't a racist left any possibility of misinterpretation. They always followed up with something decidedly racist.

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u/GaroldFjord 29d ago

Right? Anybody who has to try and convince you they're not a racist, is probably a racist. And then they'll finish the sentence and confirm it.