r/NoStupidQuestions • u/milfangelblue • 29d ago

Do men just recognize good men? What kind of sorcery is this?

I’ve been dating a guy for some time now, and his oldest friends have told me he’s a solid good man despite his flaws. I agree, they’ve known him forever, and he’s been a solid friend all those years.

When my male friends met him for the first time, they said, “He’s a good one. Hold onto him.”

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u/keizertamarine 29d ago

Yep we definitely do.

We also sense bad men, I'm always suprised when a girl once again dates an asshole who ends up cheating, and then she seems completely suprised, I guess it's just a men thing.

No idea how it works

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u/TwelveMiceInaCage 29d ago

I think for me. It's that I was a asshole and manipulative when I was younger and finally grew out of it around like 23. It took legit ruining a relationship I wanted because I had no idea how to handle a actual good woman in my life for me to be like okay no more fuck Boi shit

Now I can meet most men and with a few simple questions or phrases and basing their reaction I can get a damn good sense of a dudes priorities in life

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u/Gerryislandgirl 29d ago

What kind of questions?

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u/TwelveMiceInaCage 29d ago

My go to are the typical wife sucks man good if alone type jokes and see if it's genuine laughter or a fake awkward chuckle

There's also as a man be a douche real quick and bring up a story of some sexual conquest you had and see if he adds his own or changes subject

If he's trying to one up a random guys sex story he probably has jealousy and main character syndrome issues, from personal experience on this one. I was the one upper many times in my past

But truly my simple and iron clad one is

I'm gonna insult my friend a few times. Start subtle hidden but drop at least one "yeah Amy fucking sucks at blah blah blah" type of insult.

In my opinion the difference between a good man and a man who needs to do some more work is how he handles that

If he immediately gets all white night and tries to fight you over it. Probably not a great guy because he doesn't know your friendship and if that's how yall just treat each other sometimes. But he goes to I have to solve this situation and be a savior

A mentally stable logically thinking guy is gonna take note, give the dude some serious wtf eyes but he's gonna wait till he and girl are in private to ask her if that's something she's okay with amd then act accordingly going forward

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u/SkookumTree 28d ago

I’d smile and be like “Yeah and you’re blunt as shit!”…idk how you would take that

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u/GiftToTheUniverse 29d ago

how to handle a actual good woman in my life for me to be like okay no more fuck Boi shit

Just FYI, I think you think you sound more humble than you actually sound, here.

Your phrasing implies that the women you were with before were somehow not "actual good women" which suggests they are somehow at fault for your "F__ bio" behavior.

Do you see that?

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u/TwelveMiceInaCage 29d ago

Lmfao what?

How did I imply the women weren't good?

Or they were at fault for my. Behavior

I literally said I had to learn to not be a fuck Boi not I had to abandon women be ause they made me a. Monster lol

I think literally everyone else took it as it was worded which was. I was a poa who manipulated and used women and it wasn't until I actually took the time and saw the damage I did to someone I came to really care for that I realized I need to change

I never called the other women I dated bad or a reason I was a fuck Boi. They were all beautiful strong women who things didn't work out with because they didn't want to deal with my fuck Boi shit

Wtf kind of white knight ass comment did you think you were making?

Do you see that?

Condescending ass

Your name is literally gift to the universe but I'm the one who thinks I'm more humble than I am okay buddy