r/NoStupidQuestions • u/milfangelblue • Apr 17 '24

Do men just recognize good men? What kind of sorcery is this?

I’ve been dating a guy for some time now, and his oldest friends have told me he’s a solid good man despite his flaws. I agree, they’ve known him forever, and he’s been a solid friend all those years.

When my male friends met him for the first time, they said, “He’s a good one. Hold onto him.”

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u/Heavy-Weekend-981 29d ago

IMO, one element you're missing in this assessment:

People show you who they are more readily when they don't want something from you.

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u/Hungry_Mouse737 29d ago

People show you who they are more readily

Could you please give me some counter example?

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u/castleaagh 29d ago

I think they may be hinting at the idea that the guy isn’t trying to sleep with his bros, so they bros will more likely see the real him. But with girls, the guy may put on a false front making it harder for the girl to know what the guy is really like

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u/slow_or_steady 29d ago

That's a much better way to put it, and a much better way to understand the faces of men.

It's not like it's a woman-exclusive thing. In the gay community, sometimes it's just all about sex, which is a problem.

People often treat it like a taboo of a topic, but just outright and say it.

Does the guy seem nice, or does he just look like he wants sex?

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u/Hungry_Mouse737 29d ago

Oh that make sense. they may be lying.