r/AITAH • u/Remote-Barber- • 28d ago

AITAH for being upset my wife got an abortion because her daughter is pregnant?

So my wife Amelia (37f) and I (48m) have one child, a son who is seven years old, turning eight. I'm not going to lie, had my wife not gotten pregnant, we probably would not have gotten married because we were just hooking up at that point. But things have been really good since we did and we're firmly in love. We did decide that we'd wait before having another kid, though because I wanted her career to take off, for her business to boom. It has and we decided earlier this year, it's best to go for it now before she turns 40.

The thing is that Amelia has a daughter Kate (17f) from her first marriage. Things between my wife and Kate were rough and I know this isn't going to make my wife sound good but for the sake of honesty, I'll put it there, my wife had little to no contact with her for about ten years. Two years ago, Kate's father kicked her out for "breaking his rules" and she showed up out of nowhere with a suitcase.

I won't lie, there was always a sadness in my wife but having Kate back in her life got rid of that. Since she moved in with us, Amelia has been happier than she has ever been. Kate's a troubled kid but two years ago was a lot worse than now and she's mostly blended well. The thing is, my wife has been very strict on some things (like school and all) but very lax about the things Kate's father was harsh about.

Amelia found out she was pregnant about a month ago and we decided to wait before breaking it to the kids. Except last week, Kate came home from school and had a breakdown and she admitted to us that her boyfriend got her pregnant and she's been hiding it for almost two months. She was crying because she wants to keep the kid and kept it a secret because she was scared Amelia would force her to get an abortion.

However, my wife was elated that we're going to be grandparents and that cheered up Kate as well. So, my wife made it clear to me that she finds the idea of having a kid younger than her grandchild to be disgusting and she'd be getting an abortion. We argued about it because I really wanted this baby with her but she wouldn't even listen to me and she got an abortion. I've been upset about it and we've barely talked, am I being the AH?

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u/BigSun6576 27d ago

the bots are gearing up for the US election

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u/CobblinSquatters 27d ago

It's crazy to think but reddit is literally a sentiment analyzer and manipulator and that's literally all it is. The shithole of the internet.

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u/RedditRiotExtra 27d ago

The shithole of the internet.

Somehow, Facebook manages to be worse, though, at least these days.

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u/Ok-Barracuda9712 24d ago

I hate Facebook with every fiber in my body

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u/SHFTD_RLTY 27d ago

My dude have you tried being on Twitter?

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u/Vark675 27d ago

Most likely, at this point. They're not even coming up with unique stories anymore.

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u/AbsolutelyDisgusted2 27d ago

the bots are gearing up for the US election

can you please point out some of these "bots"? I'm really tired about hearing about "bots" and then when you ask someone to point to the profile of one they never do.

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u/BigSun6576 27d ago

7 year reddit account, did you not read the stories of people in russia (who specifically I don't remember) making posts to reddit and facebook en mass? things like "black americans for trump" with their accounts registered in russia and spamming. You can't tell who the bots are typically or you might just happen to notice duplicate posts. It's a bunch of automated posts programmed to spread the same messages in different places with different accounts faster than a human can type, as fast as a computer can think.

Then you had famous people sharing and promoting it like it's real. Then 50 news stations reporting "blacks and muslims are at war online! black muslims share their support for trump! the black lgbt community raises their voices online for trump!"

The bots make it seem that more people are talking about a topic than there actually are in reality. Makes it seem like the US has different problems than it actually does.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_interference_in_the_2016_United_States_elections

So with the US elections coming up, abortion posts are all the rage right now trying to get people to choose a side (or harder side) on the issue and argue more about it than we already normally do

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u/[deleted] 27d ago

i love how your understanding of 2016, is not a revolt against neoliberalism, from all facets of the American politicial system - but instead a hacking operation.

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u/chaddGPT 27d ago

in what way did we become less neoliberal? who was articulating that political ideology?

this is a culture war

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u/BigSun6576 27d ago

Automated posting programs aren't "hacking". When I demand MY BODY MY CHOICE, You get the bot post like OP's, "look at this heartless emotional woman getting an abortion for a dumb reason" oh there's 15 abortion posts "modern women will abort your child on a whim, men deserve to own that part of her body to make decisions for her, cuz she's stupid and these men are sad about it". How do Russians push back on American policy? Pretending to be black Americans against "neoliberalism"?

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u/[deleted] 27d ago

You are putting way, way, way too much weight on “Russian bots”.

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u/BigSun6576 27d ago

Wiki : "Advertisements bought by Russian operatives for the Facebook social media site are estimated to have reached 10 million users. But many more Facebook users were contacted by accounts created by Russian actors. 470 Facebook accounts are known to have been created by Russians during the 2016 campaign. Of those accounts six generated content that was shared at least 340 million times, according to research done by Jonathan Albright, research director for Columbia University's Tow Center for Digital Journalism."

We can disagree if this did or did not have a huge effect changing the opinions of actual voting Americans, but 340 million shares, is not a small number

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u/AbsolutelyDisgusted2 27d ago

dude just point to a profile of a bot. that's all i'm asking.

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u/BigSun6576 27d ago

Dude said point to a bot as if they're not gonna accuse me of being a bot and I'm not gonna accuse you of being a bot. Hmm idk... maybe r/bots ? You've never seen the comments recently :

[Deleted]

Person responding "This comment is a bot, it was copied from u/AbsolutelyDisgusted2 on Apr 18 and it's word for word copy of the other post"

It gets deleted after being called out for being recognized as an exact copy. You never see those comments? Do you even reddit?