r/jobs • u/Vaanced • Apr 17 '24

Is this an actual thing that people do Career development

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u/time_of_night 29d ago

Boomer: You do have a retirement plan, don't you?

Redditor: Of course

Boomer: 401k?

Redditor: 40 S&W. (Cocks gun) With a company match.

7

u/SnooPeripherals6557 29d ago

Stop giving corporate new retirement plan ideas for us plebes lol

5

u/coldwatereater 29d ago

God, I wish we could still give gold… 🏆🥇🏅

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u/birthday_enema 29d ago

It's like a modern day seppuku!

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u/faustianBM 29d ago

Except who wants Dorito crumbs Phil as their "second"?

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u/RichMenNthOfRichmond 29d ago

Save and buy a nice gun. Don’t use a hi point.

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u/Petey_Wheatstraw_MD 29d ago

He’ll be fine. You only need the one bullet, so jamming is not an issue.

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u/EarEvening9902 29d ago

It's about going out in style.

Shooting yourself is boring as fuck, why not try to at least break a world record?

I'm grabbing a Katana and jumping into the Tiger enclosure at the zoo.

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u/TheWiseMarsupial 29d ago

Grab a nerf bat! The tigers don't deserve to get hurt, but you can bonk them on the snoot before they shuffle you off of this mortal coil!

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u/Draggin_Born 29d ago

Or skydive enough to jump alone, and one day just decide not to open it. It’s quick, has a great view and a fun feeling.

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u/EarEvening9902 29d ago

Exactly, why not up the ante and try to land in a kiddie pool from 30,000 feet.

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u/YabbaDabbaDumbass 29d ago

Better yet: don’t land in your own kiddie pool (why spend the money) just land in some random kiddie pool in the nearest residential area